Understanding the lived experience of my team has made me a better leader
I’ve been intrigued by leadership since childhood. The reason was simple — if you need a team of people to work to achieve an objective, it must be pretty big, scary and exciting.
Quite early on it dawned on me that to influence the best kind of change, we need to channel our inner bravery and dream meaningfully (not necessarily big).
Six months ago, I became the director of my branch of one hundred people at Samaritans, a mental health charity with over twenty thousand volunteers in the UK.
These reflections are a journal entry for myself, which I’ve decided to make available for anyone to read. The intention here is me thinking out loud, I have no desire to frame the below as guiding principles. I’m still learning.
An important bit of context, when I say ‘people’, I’m referring to anyone in your organisation who will play a role in materialising the company strategy. When I say ‘you’, it’s me talking to myself, not telling you what to do.
Your organisation exists in the context of people’s complex lives
In my time leading our branch at Samaritans I’ve had to respond to people scenarios I couldn’t have entirely foreseen. They all form a fundamental part of the cycle of life. I’ve experienced volunteers:
- Pass away (for reasons unrelated to our charity)
- Have their first child
- Experience miscarriages
- See loved ones pass away
- Experience mental health struggles
- Move cities, sometimes countries
- Take on more responsibilities at work, having less time to volunteer
- Take on further studies (PhDs, Masters degrees…)
- Go through redundancies
- Be diagnosed with health conditions
- Start new businesses
- Go through break-ups, divorces and other major relationship changes
Reading through that list, perhaps there’s at least one or many points that you’ve experienced and recognise how it influenced you professionally. As the most senior person in our branch of the organisation, I’ve had to learn how to thoughtfully handle any and all of the above situations.
The culture that you influence will greatly determine how motivated people remain whilst life happens. On the flip-side, I’ve had to learn the right level of support to offer, without making myself accountable for finding solutions to their life problems. It becomes much easier when you limit your support to what you can solve for within the organisation. The hard bit is sometimes feeling like that isn’t enough.
Your greatest power lies in the minds of the people, nowhere else
Titles, rankings, tenure and other measurable variables are all important. Yet, they can sometimes distract you from where the most meaningful power lies. People’s belief in what you can achieve and the paths you may take to get there.
At all times, the people you surround yourself with are telling themselves a story about you in their minds. A place where you can’t make any changes. As a director, I’ve learned how little control I have of how this perceived narrative may fluctuate. So far, it has felt like my power lies in my ability to instil confidence in people’s mental models of who I am, what I care about and why I’ve decided to be a director.
Your approach to communicating around the organisation, openly and frequently , can help dispel misinformation and misconception.
In hindsight, it’s obvious — people’s opinions of each other are always in motion, that’s been true at all points in all of our lives. Think about how you felt about your parents as you experienced puberty, shaping your own identity and drawing boundaries between what you believe in and what they told you. This mental process is healthy, it’s crucial to shaping the most objectively good outcomes.
A challenge has been to as effectively as possible translate my intentions into people’s understanding of who I am and what I’m about. When I do it well, people in my branch can see how it aligns with their own value system — motivating them into high-quality action. Sometimes, resulting in really healthy challenge and open discussion. When I don’t do it well, stagnation, procrastination and hostile resistance.
How you can prioritise for the best outcomes in people’s minds
What has worked for me, so far, is building as much consensus around the most important outcomes. This can be as simple as writing a few bullet points around what’s most important for the team to focus on, along with why, then repeating it as often as appropriate and remaining consistent over time. Or as complex as a very involved operational change that requires co-creation and buy-in at all levels.
As priorities shift in your organisation, approach it like a DJ might a crossfade between two tracks. To make it feel seamless, you need to include people in the process. This can look like:
- Asking for feedback along the way
- Making adjustments based on feedback
- Being honest about what you haven’t figured out yet
- Openly praising good ideas
- Crediting the people who shared ideas that helped shape the plan
- Moving with confidence and building momentum once you feel you have majority buy-in
- Repeating the priorities over time so it’s clear on everyone’s minds
- Publicly praising desired outcomes, along with the people and the actions that led to those outcomes
- Remaining transparent about mistakes made along the way, along with quickly pivoting and communicating better results
- Celebrating important milestones and reminding people of progress
- Regularly and proactively checking in on your leadership team/direct reports
The organisational strategy is what people talk about when you’re not in the room
There is a lot more detail I can share on all of the previous numbered points. The most important bit is that you try to do each of the above — sometimes in sequential order, others, remix it appropriately! The outcome can be a clear mental model of how people perceive you, your methods and your desired results.
When you’re not in the room, people will share their opinion amongst each other around the work that you’re doing. The opinions they share with trusted colleagues are all variables in your overall ability to execute. Should you have established a level of trust with people in your organisation, it seems that, for the most part, people’s opinions will find their way to you.
By design, I’ve learned to develop a healthy distance with my role as a leader.
This may seem anxiety inducing, to be honest, it can be — but it doesn’t have to. Your approach to communicating around the organisation, openly and frequently , can help dispel misinformation and misconception.
I’m learning to trust the process, especially at the points of greatest concern. Trusting the process mustn’t be confused with inaction. In fact, the opposite. Trusting the process, for me, has meant believing that if I seek feedback, iterate accordingly and communicate openly — following each of the points listed in the previous section, the knotty details will iron out over time.
Your commitment should run no deeper than your ability to remain effective
I’ve had moments where it could be argued that I was overworking and overthinking. Trying to preempt multiple potential scenarios, overly communicating, the list goes on… In fact, I had feedback from some volunteers that the communication felt a bit much at times.
Sometimes, this can lead to a sense of frustration and disappointment. These sentiments are detrimental to your impact, they will seep through to your engagement and the energy that you bring to your organisation — eventually affecting others.
It is thrilling to see what can happen when a group of dozens, hundreds of people are aligned on what’s important, then take the action to make it happen.
By design, I’ve learned to develop a healthy distance with my role as a leader. Recognising that I am most effective when I can make room for a stroll in the park, finishing a great book I’m reading, spending time with my friends and family, meditating, journaling and exercising.
If through your level of commitment, you struggle to make room for yourself, this will show its cracks in the long run. If you start to see these cracks, respond and course-correct before there’s any meaningful undesired impact.
Enjoy the wonderful journey
It is thrilling to see what can happen when a group of dozens, hundreds of people are aligned on what’s important, then take the action to make it happen. The outcomes can feel beautiful and sometimes hard to believe.
I’m actively making an effort to appreciate the journey as much as I can. I feel very lucky to have been nominated the director of my branch, I feel excited for what the future holds in this and many other leadership roles.
In the meantime, I will continue to share my reflections and make the most of these wonderful moments. If you’ve found yourself in a leadership role, in whatever walk of life, I hope this helps and I hope you’re savouring each moment.
